Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
