good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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