the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize