Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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