how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
