I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Randomize
