You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
