Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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