im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
they need to just BURY HIM!
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
