His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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