We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
