So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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