If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Randomize
