So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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