Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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