We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
