my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize