...so i touched it.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I think weed is turning my hair brown
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
