It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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