Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
