That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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