I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
He's a Shit stain on my heart
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
