Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
