bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
