oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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