why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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