The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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