Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
