I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize