i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
