Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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