oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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