doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
