please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
