i need an iv and a liver transplant
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
i think my cat just said my name.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
