um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
