I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
