So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize