If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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