We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
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