More tranny stories later!
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Threesome in a minivan. New low
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
My feet surprised me
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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