it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
