I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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