member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
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