Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
