Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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