i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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