There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
