I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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