Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
