I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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