If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
